EXAM!

So since coming back from Spring Break I've been studying and working and just haven't been able to draw all the things I want....but I have been keeping a list so when exam week is over I can update. Until then just be patient. :(

Study bug

So I know I was due for a post a week or two ago but I've actually been working a lot more hours, and any time I wasn't working I was feverishly studying for another Psych exam. I didn't do so well on the last one and wanted to do much better this time...which I did! :D I got a B+ and I'm hoping the last one will be an A and my Case Study I have to write will be and A, then my grade will hopefully raise more. I can do some extra credit as well to help that too.
To make up for missing a few posts I have lots of doodles :)

Still having trouble getting Hubby to actually eat during the day...boys are so stubborn.

So Mother Nature has been finicky lately and can't seem to make up her mind on what the weather will be. It's been interesting, to say the least...

The one below is a friend Peter. He really likes Card Captor Sakura, an old school Japanese anime.

This last one is actually a story from my psych professor, but I put me in the doctor position because I felt like drawing myself. :P

Class ramblings

Well I haven't been perfect with posting every week but I have been getting better so I don't think I'll complain yet. :P

While nothing really amazing happened last week I will say it was one of the first times in a while that despite nothing happening I was still quite happy. As much as I love the winter and snow after months of it my situational depression doesn't. I mean it hasn't been really sunny on a consistent basis yet but the snow is 90% gone in most areas, so being able to actually go outside more often has been a slight mood lifter in itself.

I've been asking my boss about the probability of a promotion. I'd get a pay raise and slightly better hours...about 30ish on a good week. But if one came up I'd likely have to be transfered and I really, really like working for my current manager and ASM. I haven't had this kind of luck with jobs ever, and I've had a job every year since I was 13. So I figure until one comes up at my store, which might be this Christmas, I'm going to stick with looking for a second job. I'd rather not take my chances and lose one job I actually like for one that I'll hate just because the second one might be full-time over having 2 part-time jobs.

Class has really been the source of my doodles lately. I have this pair in front of me that constantly flirt the whole class period. It's got to be the most annoying thing ever. I mean really, I thought this stuff was for high school...in the movies, not real life. This is a more advanced psychology class we're in. Do the little brats in the US these days really care that little for their education now? I guess the pretty boy next to her who will obviously cheat on her with the blonde bimbo a few seats over, or the sickly-thin girly girl who clearly cares more about her image and how much make-up is on her face is more important now than their education. No wonder the professor said most of the first exams were below a 60/100. I feel sorry for the teachers like mine who actually care that their students learn something.
Anyways, here are some fun drawings I did from class last week and yesterday. The one below the doodle of the two kids flirting is that one girl I mentioned, who sat behind me before I moved, who repeated literally everything the teacher said in mumbles that I could still hear. Damn, that was more distracting than the flirty ones.

So anyways the rest here are just quick things I drew to remember a few things I thought were more important. For most of my class I listen in while I doodle. I record everything with my computer and listen to it more intently later, far from the distractions of the class setting. :)

Edit: So at the time I wrote this all up it was before I went to work. When I got out I realized the rain had become so cold it became ice and now there's ice everywhere. :/  Man, Spring can't come soon enough.

The quickest way to his heart....

So I know that last post was just was Thus, but it only covered the week before and I am still trying to make every post consecutively on the weekends anyways. So!
Earlier in the week I was stumped for ideas on what to draw. At about 11pm I finally grabbed my sketchbook and left sleeping Hubby for a small place 2 blocks from me called Comet Cafe. It's a nice cozy place and is usually packed during food serving hours. They close at 2am normally...like every other bar in this city, so I was happy to sit in the corner with a few beers and draw. I ended up getting a little more than I expected. It was pretty empty save for me, the bartender, a couple and 3 loud friends...one of which was super loud and apparently loved bacon a lot.

Yeah this guy was totally gone. I eventually learned his name was Nick, also known as "Moustache" because he had a Captain Hook style 'stach...the really curly kind from the live action movie with Robbin Williams. My drawings above don't show it because at the time he had his back to me and all I saw were bits of beard.
Just in case you can't read my drunk hand writing, it says "The loud drunk guy came and talked to me. His name is Nick. I learned he used to do underground stuff and was also in prison after. I also learned all the names or nicknames he was called during those times and I learned that his friend used to be a jerk to women and has finally changed and his new girl might be 'the one'. "

So...it was interesting to say the least. And I was definitely happy to only be living 2 blocks away. It made the trip back quick and easy. Here's a few more doodles I did while there.

Of course the week wasn't over yet. Unfortunately Hubby and I got in a bad argument on Thurs. Both of us were at fault really but he ended up saying some really hurtful comments. I know he doesn't mean them but he's the type that when he gets upset he tends to just spout anything without thinking. I usually hear an apology later and reasons why he knew it was wrong. He's very prideful though, so it doesn't usually happen immediately.
In any case, after I got over my upset-ness of what he said, I decided I would continue to be mad until I received the apology. I should learn that this really never works with men. I should know since I've got so much pride and ego too. Even if he wants to apologize it's really hard to just come out and say it.
It wasn't until tonight (3 days later) that I realized barely talking for that long was just depressing me further. So I decided to take action and hope he'd say sorry along the way. After thinking about it I decided the best plan of action would be to make all of his super favorite dishes for dinner. My brain concocted that if I did this he would see what a nice and amazing wife I am, and thus apologize. To my surprise, it actually worked. That old saying turned out to be more true than I realized. :P

I have concluded that this shall be the plan of action every time we have an argument now. I've never been hugged and apologized to so fast. XD

Freezin for a reason

So this last week has been really busy. I finally learned how to take the bus to my job, which was totally awesome getting to listen to music and draw the whole way. I even got to nibble on a sweet roll, which I shared with my boss when I arrived. :)

He was really hungry...  :P

Mid way through the week Hubby had to leave for 5 days on a business trip, so I attempted to spend as much time out of the apartment as possible, to keep away from BIL. I spent most of my time studying, but I got to start and finish this awesome old school game called Policenauts. It only came out in Japan so I had to find this fan made patch that translated it. It was a very cool game and definitely one of the best 'point and click' games.

On Friday I spent the night with the in-laws and had dinner with a friend of the family. She's such a sweet old woman and she was totally bent on getting on scoop of ice cream with all 20 of their toppings, with me. Luckily that changed after she had dinner. :P

I went home and drew a chicken and also a sketch of myself with an Aeris style hair-do, from Final Fantasy VII. I'd had it up in an Asian style with a chopstick, and after pulling it out it looked all cool and curly.

Saturday was the big day. I had signed up to participate in the Polar Bear Plunge, where I pledge a certain amount in donation to a cause (this was the Special Olympics) and then get to leap into freezing winter waters. XD I was so nervous the few days before. When I pre-registered the guy was trying to tell me it was totally just mind over matter. I was far from convinced...

Turns out though, they were right. It really wasn't that bad! It not only wasn't terrible but I loved it so much I wanted to do it again! So I'm definitely going to sign up next year too!

But baby, it's for science!

I did a doodle in class last week about the Scientific Method. I decided I wanted to color it and make it pretty before posting it. I had my hair pulled up and thought it looked pretty awesome.

This week has been good. I actually had an almost real work week since I worked 4 days...granted the shifts weren't full shifts but still. Saturday, however, my boss made a scheduling mistake and needed someone to partner up with the ASM so he wouldn't be handling the store on his own, on a Sat night. I had been working since 10:30am and quickly volunteered for the hours, giving me a double shift. As tiring as it was I actually enjoyed myself and I actually kept up to speed with my ASM in how many customers I got to reserve something or subscribe to our discount card. Go me! The icing on the cake was when I overheard the ASM tell the boss this on the phone and hearing his response...

I actually thought Friday would be my toughest day, but it turned out to be really nice. The 25th of Feb is my mother-in-law's birthday. Unfortunately though, this Feb 25th marked the 10yr anniversary of her eldest son's murder (Hubby's older brother). I never had the pleasure of meeting him but everything I hear from anyone seems to be nothing short of awesome. I've never experienced something so horrible but it always angers me to hear of such amazing lives being taken from this world by such senseless acts.

It truly was a situation of being in the wrong place at the wrong time, and since knowing Hubby and his parents I try hard each year to help them achieve more happiness than the year prior, because I know it's still very painful at times.

This year, since I knew it was slightly more important, I decided to get a really nice bouquet of flowers that were chosen specifically by me instead of a florist. I know flowers aren't always the most thoughtful of gifts but it happens to be one of the things my mother-in-law doesn't ever seem to receive much. It took me several days to find a florist I liked and then it took me about 40min of comparing flowers up against each other to see if the colors were what I wanted. I finally opted for some peachy-yellow roses with some dark pink carnations and some small white flowers and greenery. It looked perfect.

And the best part was, my mother-in-law loved them too. :) I'm happy I was able to bring her some small happiness on such a painful day.

If it wasn't already obvious I've been experimenting with coloring some of my work. Not sure if it will end up being a permanent thing with all doodles or just something I do for ones I deem more important. Probably the latter for now. It started earlier this week when I had begun working on another drawing in class (after the above one) and decided it and it's previous doodle would need to be colored. The proportions aren't perfect, but I was doing it from memory so can you blame it? I'm pretty happy with it's turnout though, and glad that after so many years of my graduation from art school that I'm still able to draw more realistic cartoons pretty well.

Sorry this week wasn't more exciting. Next weekend will be fun though so I'll save it that for next weekend's post. :)

Loads of doodles!

Like my last post said, it's been a bit rough. I truly did want to post, but 4 weeks ago I was still pretty sick and spend Sat going to the doctor, then work, and finally dropping off my prescription and then picking it up on Sun.
I also found out I have a good chance of having exercise-induced asthma. He asked a bunch of questions and did a minor breath test. He said he was pretty sure I did, but because I'd gone 26yrs without any serious problems that he'd just give me an inhaler to "be safe". So it's not like I have to take it, but it just makes things nicer when I go running....which I have to pick back up now that the snow and ice has melted off the sidewalks.
So then, speaking of which, 3 weeks ago the snowpocalypse hit the mid-west and there was snow up to my waist! I'm 5' 8" by the way, so it's not like I'm short. I could have posted but I haven't seen this much snow, this deep, since I was in high school. I was giddy to say the least.

This last week I was actually in the midst of drawing, to recap, when my brother-in-law came up to me, and I guess decided it was his business to tell me I need to look harder for a full-time job. Then 3 days later he brought it up again, asking for a report by tomorrow on my job situation. The second time I spoke up and told him that it wasn't any of his business. It ended up going back and forth with him trying to pull the card of we're in his apartment and therefore I should go by his rules, and I reminded him that half of it is paid for by his parents...yada yada. Most of it was complete stupidity and I just kept standing my ground that it wasn't his place to demand anything from me and I wasn't going to report anything to him. It finally ended when I guess he gave up and left.
Now I will speak honestly. Yes I'm not looking as hard as I could. It's hard when I see Hubby, who's got way more job-happy qualifications than me, get refused and then expect to get anything myself.
However, BIL also has a shitty part-time job that can't even cover his rent and he takes music classes that are also paid for by his parents. So it's pretty clear he can't stand on his own either.
While he might have been right, on some level, he doesn't know anything about me and clearly needs to get his own life in order first. So he has zippo rights to say anything to me about what I should be doing. These are things my mother, father, husband, or good friends can say. I don't give a damn if he was right, wrong, or talking about purple sheep. He shouldn't be telling me what to do because he holds no authority, friendship, or kindness with me.
So yeah. It's just been really stressful for the past few weeks with school, no hours at my current job, and living with someone I can't stand.

There was some good that came out of last week though. I've been thinking about where I should take my career as a psychologist, job wise. There's private practices, hospitals, joining a group, teaching, research, or having my own business. All of those, except the first one, didn't seem to connect. But then I thought about doing it for the military. My entire family is Navy; both grandfathers, mother, father, uncle, and first youngest brother. Even now my youngest brother is looking at the Air Force as a radiologist. So, since the lifestyle has been what I've known and am used to, I began to think more about it and look into it. I didn't say much to anyone until I was sure about it, and even then I only called my dad for his opinion. Like he did for my youngest brother he suggested I too look at the Air Force because it would suit my personality better.
But there was one problem I worried about as I looked to contacting a recruiter....

I was certain they would disqualify me, but I was determined and decided it was better to hear "no" than not try. Turns out, the decision I made 5yrs ago to stop taking medication worked to my favor...and the fact that I haven't had a need to see a neurologist in that long as well was good too. Basically, the recruiter told me that they normally like to see that you aren't on medication for at least a year and are still able to function. Because I stopped well over that it shows it was a life-style choice and not one to just gain acceptance. So all I need to do, when I'm able to apply, is get evaluated by someone who can then write up that I am indeed not on medication and can perform the tasks required without problems. :)

So that was my past 3 weeks. I'm going to look into ways to make myself update every weekend until I'm used to it and just do it instinctively. I've been thinking of maybe updating with a drawing a say and then posting on the weekend...just to keep me in the mood for drawing and posting. :)

Oh last week Hubby and I were walking back from the local coffee place, at night, when a large gust of wind came up and took my favorite hat from me. It blew it right over the side of a hill leading down to a ravine. Hubby didn't really have any time to realize what happened before I was already making my way down the dark and very muddy slope, yelling "I'm coming hat!!!" Happily I triumphed and saved Hat. My hands and feet were covered in mud and I had some mud spots on my clothes, but I had my hat :)

For now here are some doodles I did in class the other night, which is awesome by the way. My teacher is 100 times better than the one I had last semester. :) Plus, as an added bonus, he tends to say pretty funny comments without realizing it. You could fill a book on the random hilarious stuff he says.

Busy

It's been a rough couple of weeks. I'll post more when I'm able. :(

Haven't forgotten

No I actually didn't forget to post this time. As my luck would have it Hubby got the flu on Thursday and by Friday night I had it. His Superman immune system kicked it by Saturday night but my shitty immune system decided to be lazy again.

Actually, it's not that my immune system sucks, it's just not very strong at fighting things off quickly and instead overcompensates by allowing me to get really high fevers.
Luckily today is the first day I woke up without a fever right away, but my body is totally exhausted. It feels like a chore just to sit up in bed, which is really annoying because I managed to get a small break in my fever yesterday afternoon and was able to move around the apartment a bit.
I also woke up this morning to Hubby cleaning up the apartment a bit. His brain basically told him that when a person is sick and the area around them is crappy they can feel worse. So he cleaned up to help me mentally feel better and then my body would have a nicer time to physically feel better. This theory I think has a lot truth to it so I don't argue that at all. The only problem is I guess his man brain also told him to not communicate this nice gesture to me, because men don't normally communicate "small things". I don't know, that's the only way my brain made any sense of it.

So as I wake up and see all this, despite my exhaustion, my ocpd self was going just a bit insane.

This past week was not without craziness. Before I got sick I spilt a small amount of beer on my laptop. I of course took all the actions to shut it off and get it upside down, etc, but I worried if any that I didn't immediately wipe up got under the keys. So a friend and my first youngest brother offered to walk me though the process of cleaning it, through a video chat. I joked with Hubby about how I should ground myself to keep any static from getting to my computer. He suggested since all my clothes had polyester that I should just go naked with some rubber snow boots on. I decided my friend and little brother wouldn't appreciate Hubby's humor and just wore light clothing and boots.

My brother came online first so I started basic steps with him only to find I couldn't do anything after removing the back because Apple has this bullshit specialty 5-point screw that they designed and patented to "keep customers from messing around with the internals". Bull shit. Apple just wants to control their product and they know they can make money off their customers by keeping them from doing the most basic of tasks like changing a battery! Seriously? I thought for a moment that maybe they just thought their customers were so stupid that they wouldn't even let them change or remove the battery, but no. It's really that Apple just wants everyone to believe that their machines run off of magic and only they can fix it for you.....for a price of course.

I looooove Apple's software. It's the best I've ever had, but their hardware sucks balls. It's not the best out there and if any computer equipment ran off of magic it certainly wouldn't be any of Apple's stuff. While I love my laptop it also can't to a lot of things I want it to, like game for example. I can't really do any gaming with Apple machines because not only are they not powerful enough but many games are only designed for the PC. On top of that I really don't like supporting a company that monopolizes their product so much that they won't even let their customers do the simplest of computer maintenance on their own, to keep their machines happy. I should be allowed to change out my ram if I want. A monkey can do that. But no, Apple has to because of this dumb ass screw.

So long story short I've been thinking of building my own machine. It would definitely give me the control I want with my computer and be more powerful as well as upgradable. Plus, it would help me learn more about computers.
I'm not totally dead set on it yet as it would likely require me selling my laptop to get the money, if I wanted it sooner rather than later. I'm really spoiled on the portability of laptops. Like right now, I'm sick but I can at least keep my brain from utter bordum by having my computer here in bed. I have to think about it more, but my brother helped show me what kinds of things I could get to build a nice one for a cheap price.

Anyways. I unfortunately feel like a drained battery. I just got back a bit of energy from eating a bit but before that I could have been a zombie and no one would have noticed the difference.....minus the eating of brains and stuff. I'm going to quit now while I still have enough energy to maybe watch a movie.

Trying hard...baby steps

Ack! I swear I didn't forget.  Ok well... Saturday came and I woke up going "blog post day!" and then I forgot. It's hard combating ADHD, but I am working on it. I also didn't post last week since my previous post was on a Tuesday and I thought maybe that was too soon.
To be honest though, not much has happened. Since school started only just this week it's been pretty quiet. Though I am very excited for this semester because the one class I have is supposedly with one of the best Psychology instructors at my college. Score! Here's to hoping right? Anyone at this point would be better than the witch I had last semester. Lol!
I have also discovered, since living here in Wisconsin, that my ideas of running in every type of weather might have been a bit misguided. I don't really think that when I said I would run in snow that I realized what that really meant for this part of the world. I shall demonstrate below....

As you can see the top doodle was my brain convincing me it would be lovely and wonderful. The bottom doodle is really what it is and pretty much impossible. :/  So for now I've resorted to running in circles in my little room of the apartment. Sigh. I don't want to pay for any gym and Hubby's mother hasn't cleared off her treadmill yet, though that would still be hard since she lives 30min away. The other option I have chosen is to go for longer walks with Hubby. So far it's been ok, but for once I kind of wish the snow would stop...as much as I love it.

If not now, then when?

So yeah. I know. It's been months. Sigh.

A lot happened, and a lot didn't happen. I'm a bit more convinced that my ADHD extends far beyond just my studies. :/  Every time I even remembered to blog I would forget in favor of something else.

Rather than have a huge post explaining all that happened I'll just post it if I remember in the future. For now here are some doodles from the end of the semester. :)

The one of me with an eye patch is a fun story. Basically I'd rubbed my eye... I guess I was scratching it or something. Then within 10min it started stinging. The stinging persisted through the day and my eye was constantly watering and hurt. So I thought it was my contacts and removed them. It didn't stop and then I had to realize that I'd scratched my cornea on accident. So for the next 2 days I had an eye patch to keep it shut and protect it while it healed. Was pretty funny looking. Happy to say it healed just fine. :)

The one above is the quickest summary I can give for the convention I went to with Hubby and a good friend, Justin. It was Blizzcon, the con for the company that makes Wow among many other good games. We had a total blast and I was happy to finally get to meet my friend Justin in person. We all enjoyed ourselves, but the real fun story was that I must have had the goddess of luck next to me because I practically made out like a bandit! XD  Pretty much everything I entered I won something, including a very nice 3D monitor for a computer......which was a total pain to get back home. Eventually Justin was shadowing me everywhere hoping my luck would rub off onto him. :P

Besides all that I've decided I'm not completely happy with what I'm doing in life. Well, I'll elaborate. I am happy but not as happy as I could be. So I've decided to make some changes and work really hard to make those changes a permanent thing in my life. No, this is not a New Year's resolution...though yes, the timing is ironic. It was just me finally looking in the mirror like I usually do and thinking "Oh I'll get to that..." and I guess I'm just tired of saying that. So instead I said "Ok, if not now, then when?"  It extends to a lot in my life right now. Yes, I am going back to school and trying to better myself, and I do have a job, and I get to see my friends in Wow and enjoy playing in my free time....but it's really not enough. I'd like to do all those and more. I keep telling myself I'll get back into piano and Japanese, and I'll try to eat better and yada yada. But then I get distracted by something else or forget...and just tell myself "later".  Well, like I said, I'm tired of it and decided I'm going to have all the things I want in my life and I'm not going to keep saying later. So I wrote a nice poem to go on my bed and did a few doodles for it, for the blog. :)